Just found out I'm pregnant. High risk of ectopic so I don't want to tell everyone yet, but my depression, bpd, and anxiety is flaring up and I feel really low. Hubby is gone for military until Saturday and I want to tell him in person. I'm really struggling. Reached out to my mom but she can't come over for at least another 4 or 5 hours and anyone else I invite over I'd either end up spilling the beans or they'd see the marks from the blood tests (it's way too hot for long sleeves)

I feel like I'm just about to start sobbing. Anxiety is so high it's affecting my ability to breathe and it's making my neck and shoulders hurt. I'm so overwhelmed with cleaning to be done and I can't take my adderall or my lorazepam and I haven't even heard from my doctor about my beta levels. Plus having a crabby toddler, I'm just feeling like I'm at a loss here.