Before baby comes, there seems to be a laundry list of things you need to get done.
Cleaning and organizing and shopping and work and just, stuff, so much stuff!
All of it piling up, none of it seeming to get done.
That’s just the mom anxiety starting in on you -you’re eager to make everything just right for your baby and also worried about all of the ways your own life is going to change.
It’s totally normal.
And totally stressful.
There are some things you really should do before baby bursts forth into the world, and there are some you should just let go.
7 Things Every Mom Should Do Before Baby Comes and 3 You Can Skip
Get Your Budget In Order
Babies are ex-pen-sive. There are plenty of ways to cut corners and scrimp on the costs, but honestly, there are going to be so many more necessary expenses that come along with parenting. Sit down early in your pregnancy and hash it all out. Consider how much you will need to save in order to enjoy maternity leave. Think about what you will do for childcare and where money for that extra expense will come from. You may need to seriously begin adjusting your budget right now.
Talk to Your Partner About Parenting Expectations
Everything from will there be spankings to who will get up at night should be chatted about. But, remember this is an open conversation. You and your partner are, what I like to call, parents in progress. You both have a lot to learn and people often change their ideas once baby actually shows up. Revisit this conversation often after baby arrives so no one has misunderstandings or unmet expectations that could lead to resentment and unhappiness.
Tell Your Employer You’re Pregnant
When you do that is up to you -there is no rule that says you have to let them in on your secret until you’re ready. If you’re planning to return to work following your child’s birth, however, you should be upfront and honest with your boss about your expectations and timeline. Give them time to coordinate your duties while you’re away and they are more likely to make your transition a smooth one.
Get Some Rest
It’s not going to carry over to baby days, but it’s nice to feel rested and ready for your new mom life. Plus hauling a baby around inside your person is exhausting!
Spend Time With Your Other Children
If this is not your first, now is a great time to enjoy some special moments with your first born. Spend time doing all of the things you won’t be able to get to so quickly once baby is born. You will cherish those last days of just the two of you.
And Don’t Forget Your Partner
Some couples choose to go on a baby moon before baby comes to mark the transition from couple to parents. Even if a getaway is not in your plans, take some time to connect with each other. Soon, you won’t even be able to talk without a little someone in the mix, and when you can, you’ll probably want to sleep instead.
Think About Whether or Not You Want to Breastfeed
You can change your mind. You can always change your mind. No matter which choice you go with, you can take it back when baby arrives. Or modify it. Thinking about it in advance will just help you prepare yourself more appropriately. Plus, breastfeeding is more than just a physical commitment to keeping your baby alive. There is a mental commitment there too that your mind may need to adjust to before baby comes.
3 Things You Can Stop Worrying About
Taking a Childbirth Class
Listen, they are nice and informative and great. But, if you don’t make it to one before baby comes, know that nature will do it’s thing on your body and your baby will come regardless. Or, your doctor will take care of things and that will be that.
Making a Birth Plan
This is another one that is nice to have, but totally not necessary. In the end, the plan is to have a healthy baby, right? As long as you, your partner, and your practitioner are totally on the same page about that, not having a written out plan isn’t going to make a major difference. If creating one is stressing you out, have a chat with your doctor about what delivery day will look like, get your questions answered, share your ideas about what you want and roll with that.
Finishing the Nursery
Sure, it would be lovely to sit in your baby’s beautiful room and imagine him sleeping soundly in his crib. But, really, no need to break your back over it. True story: it will probably be months after baby comes home before he is really sleeping soundly in his own bed. Honestly, it could be months before he is even sleeping at night. If finishing the nursery seems daunting and unlikely, let it go, girl. Your kid won’t even notice.
Looking for other moms to help make your transition go smoothly? Join us in the mom.life app where we are constantly there to support new (and not so new) moms!