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Briana
My bonus child has been extra extra whiny and needy. He won't use his words instead he just whines (and sorry if it offends anyone) but I don't support that. So if no words are said I send him away. He's starting the uppy "in the arms" again. He will not get out of bed on his own like he used to instead whines from the bed until we go in. It's driving me a little insane especially with baby coming so soon! I have tried the play together for 2 hours, mommy dates, and also the calm tones looking him eye to eye. I'm running out of ideas. Any opinions ladies? I'm starting to think I should just ignore the behavior and not support it until he understands. He's 2 1/2 years old; I know terrible troublesome twos! But advice please!
8.2 лет

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maciecakes

kids pick up on even the smallest changes. My 3 year old sister lives in the same house as I do and she's started peeing her pants recently and has gotten about 10x as whiney. It all started around the time my belly started getting bigger too. I'm not quite sure how to fix the problem but I'm sure it's because of changes that are happening in his life at the moment and he just doesn't understand how to cope and handle them.

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maciecakes

kids pick up on even the smallest changes. My 3 year old sister lives in the same house as I do and she's started peeing her pants recently and has gotten about 10x as whiney. It all started around the time my belly started getting bigger too. I'm not quite sure how to fix the problem but I'm sure it's because of changes that are happening in his life at the moment and he just doesn't understand how to cope and handle them.

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bfelixreyes

@lakecturner, you know we start the time right away. Thanks! That's great insight. @bellahali lol I wish that was the case, he actually talks very well (: just chooses to not do it when convenient for him

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twinmommabellahali

My sister is turning 5 this year and she just started talking, just a little bit. She has her own weird language and we're all confused

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lakecwalker1995

we put my girls in a chair. if they get up we don't say anything to them we get them and put them back in we don't start the clock if they are crying or screaming, we do tell them if they are crying or screaming your time will start when you stop.... what ever it is they are doing... we set close enough that we can see them but far enough away that they know they are not getting attention from acting bad...... my girls love to push me more so when I'm tired. we have also started telling them you are doing such an such wrong you need to make a decision either stop or you can go to time out then telling them you have to the count of 3

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bfelixreyes

@lakecturner, we do support time outs but they've had a lack in effect. Plus he'll just drop to the ground. I don't want to support it but I also don't want to completely ignore him. It's just been hard because if I don't ignore him he takes advantage of it. He's really good at that lol and he's begun just repeating everything and doing it again when we talk to him. I'm telling you- I'm at a total loss 😭

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lakecwalker1995

hi. I can relate so much I have a bonus Child too a little girl. and a bio little girl both have started to whine and such. we do the ignoring and telling them they are going to be big sisters too but we also do time out 1 min per age. one daughter is 29 months and the other is 20 months today I personally say 3 mins for the older one and 2 mins for the baby. when that doesn't work we do use a fly swatter on the diaper to show that we are in control and the children are not. when doing time out we tell them what they did wrong before we set them down and also tell them again when they get out and make them give kisses and say sorry... my kids love to test me to see if I will stick with it. and tho it's hard I have to, I hope this helps

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bfelixreyes

@jdrose, yes that's exactly what he does and because I won't respond to that he gets worse about it. It's for simple things too; like a toy or a certain food. I'm having trouble handling it. It's been going on for a couple months now. @aphrodite2014 thanks - we are really big in including him and repeatedly use the "your our big boy!" but he just will go opposite so it drives me a little insane. I've took care of him since he was 1 and he's always been great and now it's made a u turn; luckily we don't have the back and forth anymore granted that only happened 3 times but it makes a difference! & by all means I hate the term "step" too especially when we're supposed to be a family! That's the number one way for them to feel discluded.

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lil_bigmama

I like that it's cute thanks 4 teaching me something cute 2day

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aphrodite2014

Haha I like that term soo much better then step child!! mind if I steal that?.. the only thing I can think of is Ryan to include him in doing some things for the baby keep reinforcing that he is going to be a big brother and needs to act like it.. it will be tough though.. and when baby gets there it will be an adjustment for sure.. stay positive and try to be patient with him.. my fiancé's kids come back from their mothers and do the same thing it's soo irritating but we only have visitation for now so there isn't much we can do

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missing57user

my one yr old does the screen and whine act when I know he knows how to talk

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bfelixreyes

@lil_bigmama, My boyfriends son; I'm his step mom but we have full custody of him. So biologically he is not mine but he is mine - he's my bonus child! Lol

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lil_bigmama

What is a bonus child

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